I Love Herpes Commercials.

I love herpes commercials. They are just about the greatest thing to ever happen to television. The great thing about them is that they're really for the enjoyment of the herpe-free. Besides just sitting back and enjoying however, I suggest analyzing herpes commercials for added amusement. The first thing you notice is that

EVERY SINGLE ONE HAS A FUCKING CANOE.

To my knowledge, there has never been a herpes commercial without a couple in a canoe. Or, if they aren't canoeing they are either
1. Kayaking
2. Frolicking on the beach
3. Swimming
4. Doing something water-related.

I'm sure this can't be a coincidence, and there must be some symbolism connected to water and herpes. Therefore, I went on a mission to Wikipedia to figure it out. And they did have the answer, as they always do. According to a philosophy of water, "Water is considered a purifier in most religions....water is used to cleanse a person or an area."

Those smart ad execs. They use the image of water to make us think of purification, cleansing, and starting afresh. Too bad herpes is for life.

And hey its Texass's STD joke, with herpes.

knock knock

who's there

herpes. sorry.

nordic bitch